Full of half sentences.
I am full with half of you
Half thoughts you never quite complete
Half sentences you never finish
Half laughter you never seem to expel
You do everything in halves
As though you have no time
Or someone looked over your shoulder
Gently urging you to stop
Don’t complete that thought
Don’t finish that sentence
Don’t dare drink that entire glass
You wouldn’t dare continue laughing
Live to the fullest
Please
I’m not following.
Everyday, it’s the same routine.
Wake up, come to school.
Sit in class, pay attention.
Try to focus. Comprehend.
Understand. Take it in.
This new knowledge.
These foreign concepts.
Assimilate into your life.
Make them your bearings.
But everybody for me, is different.
I sit there trying desperately, to make it work.
But constantly failing, crying, hating.
Everyday it’s the same tale of
“Oh excuse me, I’m not following”
The Beheading.
Love is the beheading of common sense
That fuzzy feeling in your chest, the one that makes you flutter
Yeah, that’s your willpower leaving you
Your self-control is simply executed
You are officially drunk in love
It is time to do stupid things, in the name of love
Time to stay up late when you have to get up early
Time to go late to class because you won’t let go of their hand
Time to go the longer way so you can see them one more time
Time to live like a maniac
Time to unlock your inner Nicholas Sparks
Time to be beheaded by love
The saddest stories sing the sweetest songs
The saddest stories sing the sweetest songs
The most broken bodies give the most healing
From your broken heart to mine
From your wretched state to mine
Your outstretched hand takes mine
Our hands say what our mouths can’t
My worry filled eyes hold yours
Our gaze chants stories of love we cannot speak
My heart in ten thousand pieces
Carries infinities of love for yours
Your heart in ten thousand pieces
Glows with love for me
In all of our broken glory
We belong to each other so perfectly
Thousands of pieces of both of us
Melting in love into one soul
No matter how hard we pull away
We are in an unending dance
We are one in heart and one in soul
We can’t change our fate
The saddest stories sing the sweetest songs
Our broken hearts make the greatest love.
January 15, 2020 at 4:56 am
Dear Tolu,
Let me just start by saying thank you for being a part of my life and a great friend this year. Despite your daily abuse, I’m glad to be graduating the same year as you. I know you’ll reach great places, and I hope for your happiness.
Now on to the actual post, these three poems are beautiful in their uniqueness from one another. The whole idea of only having ‘half’ of someone else is quite interesting and quite painful as well. To not be given the same ‘fullness’ that you give to someone else can hurt, especially when it’s someone who you care about. I also genuinely enjoyed the last poem, revealing how love is the ‘beheading of common sense’, which is probably why its hard for logic to coexist with passion. In every situation, balance is necessary, but it’s much easier said than done.
For improvements, I would have liked to see more of your poems from your writing journal, as I’m sure there are many more in there.
All in all, hope that your Grade 12 year ends bringing you many opportunities.
Sincerely,
Abhay
January 16, 2020 at 8:33 pm
Dear Abhay,
Are we being nice to each other? This must be a first.
Thank you for letting me be in your life. I am whole hurricane but you seem to be waterproof.
I’m glad we are friends. You are incredibly passionate, and I’m thankful.
It is indeed true that logic and passion have a tough relationship.
I hope this end is just a new beginning for us.
With love,
Tolu.
January 17, 2020 at 7:39 pm
Dear Tolu,
Wow, this is so simplistic and beautiful. I really enjoyed reading every line because each one flows into the next in such a perfect way. Hearing them in my mind was pretty cool because you have established a specific rhythm within each line or stanza that goes perfectly with what you’re describing. For example,
“Wake up, come to school.
Sit in class, pay attention.
Try to focus. Comprehend.
Understand. Take it in.
This new knowledge.
These foreign concepts.
Assimilate into your life.
Make them your bearings.”
I love these few lines because the break between each sentence describes how repetitive the emotion you’re describing is. You also wrote about how hypnotizing love can feel and the structure of your sentences really emphasized that.
I cannot think of any improvements because you’re writing is so amazing already. Even hearing you share in class is so mind blowing because I really love the way you twist your pieces in the end in such a clever way.
I really loved reading this piece and I will definitely read more!
Sincerely,
Maira
January 18, 2020 at 5:47 pm
Dear Tolu,
I came to your blog because I wanted to be inspired for the day, and the first few lines of your post already hooked me in:
“Full of half sentences.
I am full with half of you”
This creates a beautiful paradox that talks about writing, and being full and feeling satisfied. It’s almost as though the character here is describing hopelessness and how hypnotic love seems, which really plays well into the rest of the piece.
The other two were also just as beautiful, and I could especially relate to the second one. Oftentimes, it feels like we’re just in a routine of doing the next thing and the next thing, and we always still fall behind. Maybe it’s best just to let go – but obviously that’s easier said than done.
I don’t think that I can offer any feedback that could actually help you, because both of us know how amazing of a writer and person you are. I’m absolutely overrjoyed that I got to meet you last year and got to know you more this year, and I will definitely miss your presence in our creative writing class. That said, you are a passionate and intelligent woman who will definitely be successful in whatever she puts her mind to.
Sincerely,
Zaid
January 25, 2020 at 6:39 pm
Dear Tolu,
This was the perfect thing to read on a Friday morning, and the perfect last piece to comment on (since this is most likely my last ‘comment’ ever). First of all, you have a unique style of writing, where I can hear your voice when I read your words. That, combined with the structure of this piece, makes it flat-out enjoyable to read. I will definitely go and read another one of your posts after this! What really stood out to me though, was the way you took opposites; life and death, love and the boredom of the every-day life, and combined them, resulting in an idea which to me, defined you. It defined who you were by showing me what you think of these 4 semi-opposites. I may be talking gibberish, but I felt that it was certainly the perfect first-thing-to-do/read on a Friday morning.
I don’t think I can say anything that would improve this piece, it’s perfect!
Really looking forward to what you post next!
Sincerely,
Unas